The floorboards of my car are usually filled with fastfood wrappers, toys and various chachka's that never make it into the house. Last night I spent an hour cleaning my car so Angelbaby wouldn't be embarrassed when I dropped her off at school this morning. I wish I had known she was going to be throwing-up all day instead of going to school.
Last night as I was sifting through the stale french fries and endless cracker crumbs in the backseat of my car I wondered to myself "what ever happened to the no eating in my car rule?" Unfortunately I know all too well what happened to that rule. And the no caffene rule. And the no toys that aren't educational rule. And the no talking back rule. And the no Barney Videos rule. Reality happened. Reality keeps rolling forward crushing under it's weight all of my preconceived notions about raising childeren.
I still remember thinking, "I'm going to stick to my rules because I actually care about my kid." As if I deemed myself the only parent in the world who cares about her child. What a laugh. The reality is- that shit creeps up on you. Daycare will introduce your child to the Barney video. You will find that it is more convenient to clean cracker crumbs out of your childs carseat than it is to listen to her cry while you are driving. Your parents i.e. The Grandparents will give your child coffee when you are not around. And just when you think "No way in hell is my sweet little girl going to play with a slutty Bratz doll- someone elses kid will show up at her birthday party with none other.
As for the talking back, I keep thinking about a conversation I had while volunteering at the Sidewalkfest this year. A fellow crew member and I were walking through the McWane Center (one of the venues for the filmfest) and he was going on about pushing the childeren aside so he could play on the science exibits "even my 6yr old daughter" he said jokingly, "I push her right out of my way." I spoke up "my daughter is six." Then he said something that I will probably never forget. "What's up with that attitude? I want my sweet little girl back."